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1、InThatGreatRiver:ANotebookThesunriseobservedinapuddle—agreatmetaphor.***St.TheresaoftheChildJesus:“Ichooseall.”***WhydoIneedtheselandscapes?Theimageoftheseadrawsmeoutofmyself,forcesallmyattentiontothesurfacesothatIcancastmythoughtintothedepthsonceagain.Asifanimag
2、inativeblowwereneededforalonger,better-aimedthrustintothedepths.Contemplation.Therootsofmyastonishmentattheworldclingtighttomyinnerlife,inatangleofmemories,experiences,atavismsfrombothmyownchildhoodandthatofourspecies.***Forfishdeathtakestheshapeofthebeautifulwhi
3、tegullwithwide-spreadwingswhoseflightwetracewithrapture.***Irememberedthebombardmentandthegreatlightthatprecededit.Atfirstitfellfromabove,thatbeautiful,blinding,greenishlight,sobrightthatitseemedtoilluminatetheearth’severywrinkle.Thatlightilluminateseveryperson,e
4、verycell,vein,arterylikeanx-ray;everythingisreadyfordeath.Itirradiatesandexposesallthatishid-denmostdeeply—terror,thebody’sanimalterror.Thelightunmasks,cruelly,beforekilling.Andthatiswhyaftertheairraidapersonrisesashamed:hehasn’tdied,he’sstillalive.It’sstrippedhi
5、mbare,tothedeath;thatlighthasrippedthelastconfes-sionfromhisbody,buthehasn’tmeasuredup,hecouldn’tdie.Heliveson,duplicitousandfrightened.ANNAkAMIENSkA231***Idon’twritepoetrywhenIwish,IwritewhenIcan’t,whenmylar-ynxisfloodedandmythroatisshut.***Thepoetisagreatmute.H
6、ewheezeshisinfirmity,mumbles,stutters,fumbles;hisgreaterrorishuman.***Theskycreakswiththeplumesofunreadpoets.***Chekhov’sgrave,encounteredunexpectedlyinaMoscowcemetery.Thefrostshineslikethegleamofhisdamppince-nez.***Akhmatova.Athickvolumeofhercollectedpoems,asift
7、heywerewrittenbyoneperson.Butafterallthereweresomany—fromyouthtooldage.Theelegant,refinedladyandtheoldpeasantwhoroarsinpainandbeatsherforeheadagainstthechurchfloor:“Lord!”Thepoetthrongedbycrowdsofadmirersandsnobs,andtheoldwoman:wise,comprehending,liketheearth,lik
8、eapeasantrockingherdeadchildinherarms.***Awhisper.Tospeakinawhisper.Towhisper—likethesea.***Todescribethehome,aroom.Itspitsandabysses.***232POETRYInMilaszewski
